Monday, August 5, 2013

Giving Up Isn't an Option

Play this song while you read! :) 

 I survived my first group workout class at the gym. I was petrified. I didn't know what to expect. I was worried I would feel less than others in the class or not know what to do. I can honestly say I probably wouldn't have done it without my workout buddy, Raycee with me. The class was called "TNT" Trim & Tone. The description included weights, body bars, resistant bands. We were prepared to really focus on toning up. Because it was the first class of the month...we were "lucky enough" to get a cardio session with those weights!

Within the first 15 minutes I was sweating! I found myself excelling in certain moves and circuits and then struggling with others. I took notice of those ones I felt I was struggling to get through. I know I gave it my all and I didn't stop. 45 minutes straight (with of course the short water breaks). It was challenging, but worth every second of. 

At the end of the workout, we did a yoga cool down for a few minutes. As I was laying down and stretching with the music I had the thought "Look at a group class. You just finished 45 minutes of an intense circuit". I have done circuits before, but at my own pace in my own house. I never stood in front of people and let all reservations down and allowed myself to leave my heart on the floor. That's exactly what I did. I let out my Monday frustrations on the floor. I thought about where I was 4 months ago, attempting to hike up a hill behind my house. I couldn't do 30 jumping jacks straight without feeling like I was going to collapse. Today I did 30 jumping jacks in 5 different sets.  I call that progress!

I want to get across one point tonight: IT GETS EASIER! Obviously, my face is the face of pain and sweat, but today was easier than 4 months ago. In another 4 months, it will be easier. Just because it does get easier doesn't mean I will allow myself to give up or become "too comfortable". I will continue to find things to push me.

So many people ask where I get my motivation and drive. I still have a hard time answering that question. 4 months ago I said out loud that I didn't have self control or discipline. Look at me now. I decided to change. . . not for a man, my mother, family, work, or friends. I changed because I knew it was what my soul and life needed in order reach other dreams and goals. This is one small step in the right direction. By getting healthy I'm gaining confidence, power, and reassurance about the woman I am and can be in the future. 

I encourage each of you to make a list. I started with 3 "things" I wanted to achieve. I didn't put a timeline on them, but I wanted to focus on events or things I wanted to accomplish but knew that the only way I could do it was if I chose a healthier lifestyle. 

1. Get my PCOS symptoms under control. 
2. Run...not walk for cancer research. 
3. Be a mom. . . someday. 

Make your list. Then I challenge you to make three small changes in your every day life that can aid in you accomplishing those goals. 

1. Cut out processed foods.
2. Workout 3-5 times a week. 
3. Drink more than 8 glasses of water a day.

 In a matter of months, you will see results and feel so much better. Not only will you take notice of the small changes you are doing, you will also be inspired to make other small changes. No matter how small, they all add up. 

Never give up. Stay strong & keep fighting! xoxo

Saturday, August 3, 2013


No Scale July was tough mentally. But this morning, getting on my scale all of those emotions went away. I had a goal of 199 in my mind. That's it. That's all I wanted from 208. So to see 194.6 you better believe I screamed "Fuck yeah!" Today marks 16 weeks, 4 months. I am officially down -47.6 lbs.

Yesterday, my workout buddy, Raycee and I did a last chance workout of cardio, HIIT, the stair master, and then some core and ab workouts. It was a great burn and I was so excited at how awesome I felt afterward. 

Now, don't get me wrong this month about 3 out of the 4 weeks I was super strict and dedicated. I missed a few workouts due to being sick and the smoke in the air but I really ate clean. Then there were a few meals where I allowed myself to try new things or add more carbs to my diet. Yes, I was worried, but I always managed to workout really hard afterward or the next day. I think mentally I needed to know my boundaries of eating certain foods when it comes to the emotions that come with afterward. I haven't really "cheated" in months. I wanted to make sure I wouldn't feel guilty eating something I know I should stay away from. I never felt guilty which made me feel confident. Eating is such an emotional and mental event that takes places a lot during the day and it's important to be in a good head space so you aren't sabatoging yourself later down the road or feeling bad about a decision. 

 Last weekend, I was able to see my mom who has also lost some weight the past few months! Check out her progress! 

Aislinn (Big sister), Mom, & Myself

-31 lbs!
 This week I've also had a few Non-Scale Victories when it comes to clothes and overall confidence about my changing and improving body! 

Old Navy clothes, size 14, & my first pair of colored skinny jeans! 

Umm...Hello Confidence! love them!
I've been dairy free for a little over a week now, and sometimes it gets really hard and other times I don't think about it. My friend Annie who is a PCOS fighter & who has lost -75 lbs with healthy eating and Barre3 mentioned the idea of cutting out dairy to improve my breakouts and I can't believe how right she was! I of course talked to my doctor and it was mentioned & agreed upon as an option to try. I'm amazed at the difference in a week!

Here's a pretty funny progress picture. On the L I was 250 in February 2013 and on the R was this week. 

July 1 vs July 31. Month progress. I see improvements and change especially in my back area but at the same time I am excited to keep pushing and see what the difference will be this month.   

My August Goals! 

Friday, August 2, 2013

All About The Gym

If you’ve been following my blog or you have me on Facebook, you know that I haven’t been to a gym (except for the week I was home in Washington).  I have hiked outdoors, and done home circuits and workout videos at my house or in my front yard.

This week I saw a girl ask on a community group on Facebook for someone her age to become workout buddies. She mentioned she went to Gold’s Gym in town because of the daycare (she has a 7 month old baby girl). I messaged her some information about my journey, what I’m hoping to accomplish and a little about myself. I was surprised by her enthusiasm to meet and start working out. We are around the same weight and endurance so I was excited to look forward to pushing one another.

Yesterday, we agreed to meet at the gym. I was so nervous. Not only was I nervous to meet someone new and workout with her, I knew that I hadn’t been in a real, HUGE gym in a long time. I waited for her to show up and was immediately intimidated. I got to the gym at around 5:30ish and it was PACKED! There were guys who looked like they were prepping for body building competitions and girls squatting and lifting double their body weight in iron. My nervous tick makes me avoid eye contact and I quietly waited for my new workout buddy. When she arrived, we went and set up my 7 day free membership pass and the staff member explained all that the gym has to offer.

Once we got everything put away in the locker room, I knew that what we were about to do was something I’ve grown to LOVE! I love working out. I may not have had a lot of equipment to use the past 4 months, but I know what my body can do now that it couldn’t back then.

We agreed we would do 60 minutes on the arc trainer and then either do some arm machines or attempt the stair master. Once we got going on the machines, it was like all the nerves went away. We realized we have common interests and have the same goals in mind when it comes to fitness and health. Gold’s Gym wasn’t like other gyms I’ve been to where everyone tries to sneak peeks at what you’re doing. It didn't feel like the groups of girls were talking about you or passing glances. Everyone is there to do one thing: IMPROVE THEMSELVES.

After our 60 minutes on the arc trainer & 15 minutes on the stair master we decided to walk around the rest of the gym so I could know where everything else was. THERE IS FREE TANNING! Yes, with your membership you can tan all you want without paying extra! I was excited about that aspect!  It got better…believe it or not. There is a protein shake bar! Yes, I can get protein shakes with my favorite protein powder! Metabolic Drive! I was ecstatic!

There is a huge lesson I learned through my exciting experience at the gym:


My down fall was listening to people tell me that this gym or that gym was dirty, or stuck up people went to it, or they judged fat people. What I should have done was experienced it myself! By holding out from the gym, who knows what else I could have accomplished? Don’t get me wrong, I’m so proud of my progress and that I know I can workout at home I necessary, but I really have missed the gym. When I was 250 lbs I definitely didn’t love the gym as much as I do now, but I think that comes with the increased confidence and knowledge about what my body needs in a workout. 

If I can give you a few hints and tips about looking for a gym they would be:
  • Get a free pass or week pass to every gym in town and try them out. (You may have up to a month free of gym use depending on where you live).
  • Try the gyms out even if you think they are too expensive.
  • Always ask what “extra” comes with the membership.
  • Get a list of classes that the gym offers! 
    • Try some classes out with your free membership pass.
  • Pay close attention to the gyms with no contracts—to me that’s a huge deal.
  • Watch when others finish using equipment, do they clean the machines off immediately?
  • Are people more focused on what they are doing than what you are doing? You’re more likely not to feel self-conscious if you know people aren’t watching you.
  • If you’re feeling brave and want to try a new machine and you see someone else using it, ask for help before you use it. Most people are willing to give you a hand to prevent injury and to teach you something new. You can build acquaintances at the gym this way.
  • Do you feel more relaxed at the gym than at home or at work? Does it feel like a place you can escape to if you need it?
  • Hours. I want a place with 24/7 access because I have random spurts of energy and want to be able to hop in the car and drive there any time.
  • Take into consideration how far away it is from home. If you’re on a budget like I am gas can take up a bit of your monthly spending money. (Gold’s Gym is a ways out of the way for me, but with all the “Extras” it might possibly be worth it).
  • If the gym you love is a bit farther away than you hope, is there a bus route that you can take occasionally to save gas money?
  • Does it have a locker room & large shower access in case you go to the gym on your lunch and need to clean up before you head back to work.
  • Do you have at least one friend that goes to the gym that you can count on to workout with when you feel the need to work out and catch up?

I hope these ideas get you to thinking about what to consider when you look into getting a gym membership. Remember, $20.00-35.00 a month to invest in yourself; mentally and physically is a great bargain.

I’m excited to continue sharing my gym experiences with you. I of course will do home workouts on occasion, I’m sure and will always post what I do.

I can’t wait to update everyone on my NO SCALE JULY progress after I weigh in tomorrow.

Stay Strong & Keep Fighting!